On being a new immigrant in her 30s and a short review on "How to American" by Jimmy O'Yang
I have recently met with a LinkedIn expert, he gave me many smart suggestions and one of them is to start sharing my journey in the US as a new immigrant. I have decided to give it a try, maybe there is something interesting in it...? Here I am, thank you for reading.
In Hong Kong (where I came from), "new immigrant" is a derogatory term. I am not sure if it is the same everywhere, but before my permanent move to the US, I have never given much thought on this.
I realized living a life abroad requires more "planning" and "premeditation" vs living a life in your hometown, where things seem to run on its own, you know how life will unfold (pretty much) or at least you know who you are and where you stand. So before I go about finding a life/ restarting a new life, I want to understand my new identity first.
Immigrants have many challenges to overcome, perhaps the most difficult are the fundamental ones. Below are just a few things,
Assimilation: I personally would not want to move to another country without trying to understand the culture, its people and become part of it. Yet culture is not something you can just plunge into or acquire on a whim, unless you are an actor. You would not want to abandon your old self at the same time.
Ethnicity becomes a starting point of who you are, how you are being viewed. To a certain extent it is not entirely unjust, given the differences from appearance to language (accents) to lifestyle choices...
Rejection: I believe this is the most important challenge to overcome in life. Life in your hometown might be tough, but the rejections you experience while living abroad due to all the differences you embody will take it to a whole new level. You need to train yourself to turn rejections into learnings, it is just part of life.
On a lighter note, I love everything this writer captured on the things she learned moving to New York.
Challenges aside, I do see the opportunity to live abroad as a privilege. It is also the best time to get to know yourself: who you are, what you want and what matters to you etc.
I am grateful that Jimmy O'Yang (the guy who played Jian Yang in HBO's "Silicon Valley") has written this book so I can get a head start on how to approach life as a new immigrant. He emigrated from Hong Kong to the US when he was 13. The "learnings" I find most valuable kind of echo the challenges I mentioned above.
- Fitting in: no matter how American you try to be, you would always feel like an outsider. No matter how long ago you left your hometown, it would always feel like home.
- Identity: you do not have to be solely defined by where you came from, and you are more than just where you end up.
- You need perseverance to live as an immigrant and to thrive on being uncomfortable to pursue what you love/ want to do.
Despite the serious learnings above, the book is actually very funny and his journey is fascinating. Many said he "made it" because he got on HBO as a regular character, he made it in Hollywood. To me, he "made it" because he comes to terms with the complexity of his identity as an immigrant and because being a comedian anywhere requires one to reach a master level of cultural fluency.
The "immigrant" identity has certainly inspired me to take a good look at where I stand in my life and where I want to go ahead. I do hope I will have just a fascinating "How to American" story to share in the near future.