Change

I embrace change.  I also have to admit that the process of it - from the initial happening of change to the moment of being comfortable with everything that comes with change, is a struggle.

Change is a beast. It can be paralyzing or liberating or both, it all depends on how you live around it.

My family is a constant rock and majority of the senior members in the household are against change, not without grounds. They are afraid for us (even though we are in our 30s) and how change could potentially ruin us. Behavioral economics’ “Loss Aversion” explains it all - it is thought that the pain of losing is psychologically about twice as powerful as the pleasure of gaining.  

Coupled with loss aversion is a sense of guilt. Change can be perceived as a tiny bit of negation to your “past life” that many of your loved ones live and it forces you to leave people behind whether you like it or not - physically, ideologically and psychologically.

Despite all these scary realities that go against change, I am compelled to conquer the beast of change due to the fear of stagnation and what it ensues. I am also terrified by the slightest feeling of “knowing it all”, especially at such a “young” age.

I want to be part of a bigger world (not just geographically), where there is endless things to learn and opportunities to grow into a better being; to understand that there are a millions ways to live life; to recognize that there are people beyond the ones I am familiar with and those who are different.

CHANGE is the gateway to that world. I would never say that certainty is overrated, there are days I long to go back to it (life as I know it and be with the people who know me so well). But the force of the unknown is strong.

This is what I tell myself:

The struggle in change is transient, so, just keep swimming.

And as Melissa McCarthy said, there is beauty in struggles:

“the best thing I could have done was struggle until I was 30.[…] I think entitlement is a really, really scary thing to possess.”